Flames
by Nightsailer
Summary: October third has come again, and as they reflect on the twists and turns their lives have taken, it seems the Flame and Full Metal Alchemists have more in common than a uniform. One shot.


Alrighty then, this is just a one-shot I did on a whim. I don't even really know why I'm putting it up - it's just some random musings of Roy and Edward. Read and review if you want. I'd like to know what you think.

…………

Edward Elrich sat by the ocean's edge, tossing tiny pebbles into the surf as he gazed blankly out over the waves. Nostalgia was playing a game of Russian roulette with his mind - millions of subconscious triggers with only one bullet that he seemed to keep finding over and over again in the form of his mother's smile.

_Burning...always burning..._

"Ah, fuck it," Ed muttered, feeding the last of the stones to the hungry surf lapping at his bare toes. The Full Metal Alchemist threw himself back in the sand, watching the reddening clouds waltz for the horizon in shining streaks of fire. Golden eyes followed them sullenly, trailing them to the blazing orb hovering just above the sea.

Blowing out a soft sigh, Ed allowed his eyes to flutter shut, choosing instead to watch the blood vessels pulse silently behind his darkened lids. And yet, even as he sought to escape the inferno in the sky, the crimson blood reminded him still of the blaze he had left behind but not forgotten.

"I thought I'd find you out here."

Ed sprang to his feet, auto-mail arm morphing to a razor-sharp point even as he spun to face the intruder. Then, seeing who it was, the Full Metal Alchemist let his arm-turned-weapon fall to his side with a snort of disgust.

"Don't you have better things to do than bug me?" he muttered as the automail flowed smoothly back into the correct shape.

Colonel Mustang smirked at the youth. "Not a the moment. I'm off duty, and my date's not for a good two hours yet." The raven-haired officer shaded his eyes against the waning sunlight. "And besides, you're not the only one who enjoys a sunset."

"I don't enjoy it," Ed said fiercely. Then, when Mustang looked up questioningly, the blond flushed deeply and ducked into his collar, hating himself as he imagined the blush licking up his cheeks like flames. "It's just quieter out here."

"Uh-huh." A small smile traced the Colonel's thin lips.

"What?!" Ed demanded, wanting with all his heart to slap the irksome grin right off his superior's mug.

"As much as we disagree, Full Metal, you and I have a lot in common," the Colonel mused. Settling down on the sand, the Flame Alchemist began to pull off his boots. "We both have things we want to forget -"

"I don't want to forget," Ed growled.

Mustang flicked an irritated glance at his subordinate. "If you make it a habit to interrupt a commanding officer every three seconds, you'll be out on your ass before you can say 'woops'." Throwing his boots to the side, the Colonel ran his fingers through his hair. "As I was saying, we both have things we want to forget, but we're both smart enough to know that if we leave them behind, we'll be losing a part of ourselves that we'll never be able to replace." He pulled his flint gloves out his pocket, but did not put them on; instead, he held them by the index finger and waved them idly before the blazing sunset.

"A part of ourselves that we never wanted to lose in the first place," he murmured. "A part of ourselves that is better as a painful memory than something lost twice."

"What the hell are you babbling about?" Ed asked grumpily. But he plunked himself down in the sand next to Mustang, following the Colonel's gaze out to the burning sea.

"Think about it, Full Metal. We have both lost something dear to us." The gloves continued to sway back and forth, back and forth, almost like a silent mantra as they weaved across the backdrop of waves.

Ed rolled his eyes. _And what could you have lost, Colonel, that is as dear to you as my home was to me?_ he asked silently.

"You have lost your mother and your home," Mustang continued, unaware of the cynicism running through his subordinate's mind. "I have lost my humanity."

Ed snorted. "Are you trying to tell me you were ever human in the first place?"

Mustang's head snapped around; onyx eyes bored into the golden ones in a blaze of fury.

"I am being serious, Full Metal. I would ask that you attempt to do the same."

Ed met the withering stare for a moment, then looked away as if it had scorched him. "I don't remember signing up to be your shrink," the youth retorted, but it was half-hearted.

Mustang heaved an irritated sigh and ran his slender fingers over his temples and through his hair. "My mental state is well beyond the capacity of any 'shrink' on the planet." He looked up, black eyes completely serious as he caught and held Edward's gaze. "All I can do is find someone to listen." A bitter smile crossed his lips. "And I thought you'd be the one to go to. You understand what it's like to have to be strong when all you want to do is curl up and die."

The sentence hung in the air for a moment. Then, softly, Ed said, "You're wrong. I understand what it's like to be strong only because that's the only thing I know how to be." He pushed his bare feet into the sand, savoring the coolness of the granules as they tumbled over his skin. "All my life, I've had something to fight for. My friends, my brother...my mom..." He shook his head. "Weakness has never been an option for me. I've had too much to lose."

"Yet you lost it anyway."

"Only a part of it!" Ed snarled. The fingers of his auto-mail hand clenched into a fist. Golden eyes followed the movement, framed by brassy hair that seemed to catch fire in the dying rays of the sun. "Only a part of it," he repeated softly.

Minutes crept by as the two sat in silence, watching the sun sink slowly below the horizon. Then, as the last of the blazing orb disappeared into the ocean, Ed's voice filtered into the dusk.

"Y'know...I think I've just figured out why I hate you so much."

Mustang raised an eyebrow.

Ed threw a smirk up at the stars. "Because you embody everything that's ever broken me."

A slow smile twitched the Colonel's lips. "Is that so?"

"Yep."

"I feel the same way." Mustang slipped his gloves onto his hands, then, igniting a spark with a snap of his fingers, let a small ring of fire circle towards the dimming horizon. "Every time I look at you, I see that child's face." Ed shot him a questioning look. Mustang directed the tiny flame with miniscule twitches of his fingers.

"Every time I see that determination - that will to live - in your eyes, I remember the child I had to kill in the war. I see the hatred of the government that ruined everything for you...hatred of the elements that are beyond even your impressive control..." he let his eyes travel to the stars winking into the night. "...hatred of the all-consuming blaze that tears down everything you ever knew while you can only sit back...and watch." Mustang snapped his fingers once more; the blaze that decorated the churning surface of the sea flickered and went out.

Ed watched the flame disappear with stinging eyes. "Then why did you do it?" he asked quietly.

Mustang's onyx eyes turned to him in the twilight. "Why did _you_?"

The Full Metal Alchemist pulled out his state alchemist watch and, flicking it open in the privacy of his palm, silently read the message etched into the gold. "Because it was the only thing I could do to keep myself from turning back."

"Well put, Full Metal." The Colonel laid back in the sand. "Well put."

Ed paused a moment, then, on impulse, muttered, "Everything reminds me of...of what happened. Everywhere I look there are flames. I can usually ignore it...but on the third of October..." he shook his head. "It all becomes almost unbearable."

Mustang said nothing.

"None of this would have happened if mom hadn't been taken away from us," Ed barreled on. "Al would have a body, our house would still be standing - our lives would be whole, untouched by the dark side of alchemy."

"Untouched by the Truth," Mustang murmured.

Suddenly angry, Ed whirled on his superior. "The truth can kiss my ass," he roared. "And what exactly IS that Truth, huh? Haven't you ever asked yourself that?"

Mustang laughed. "Wow. Do you always start to act your age when October third rolls around?"

"Answer the goddamn question!"  
"I've asked myself that thousands of times," Mustang replied. "And I always come to the same conclusion."

Ed waited.

"The truth is that nothing is whole," Mustang stated softly. "Everything is just a jumbled mass of sorrow and misery bound together by alchemy and human blood. We live our lives striving to make all the pieces fit when every individual scrap of the world around us goes to a different puzzle." Flashing black eyes met Edward's gaze. "We were created perfect. Then perfection was shattered by the truth. And now we attempt to become what we once were, flapping our broken wings and dreaming we can fly."

"Since when did you become so philosophical?" Ed muttered.

"But it makes sense, doesn't it?"

"...I guess."

Mustang grinned. "Well, that concludes our little heart to heart for tonight." Rolling to his feet, Mustang held out a hand to Ed. Ed raised an eyebrow, then pushed the Colonel's hand aside and stood up.

"It's a strength thing," he said with a shrug.

"Ah." Mustang picked up his boots and slung them over his shoulder. "I see. Well, alright then. See you at work tomorrow." He started off down the beach.

"Hey!" Ed called after him. Mustang glanced over his shoulder. "This never happened!" Ed grated.

Mustang gave him an odd look. "What never happened?" With a sly wink, the Flame Alchemist rounded a bend and disappeared into the night.

Edward watched him go, then glanced down at his watched. "Right then," he muttered, flipping it shut. Casting a sidelong glance out to see, he allowed a brief grin to touch his lips as he whispered, "Well, time to start picking up the pieces again. I don't care what he says; it's human nature to try to fit everything together." He slipped his watch into his pocket and gave it a quick squeeze. "Even if nothing will ever be whole again." Then he turned and strolled into the shadows, leaving the gleam of the fading dusk behind.


End file.
